As is somewhat of a usual happenstance for me, I was in the process of researching another topic when I ran across a website called "The Golden Age of Cartoons". I have always been (and continue to be) a fan of the old cartoons from the 40s, 50s and early 60s. I remember sitting in front of my mother's portable black and white Zenith TV after school watching the old cartoons that often portrayed characatures of movie stars of the "Silver Screen" like Garbo, Gable and Jimmy Durante -- most of whom were still alive at that time...
I wasn't at all prepared, however, for the section of the website called "Censored Cartoons". In fact, I'm surprised that a huge bug didn't fly into my mouth as it was hanging open in disbelief for the better part of an hour as I skimmed through every, single cartoon listed in that section -- stopping every couple of minutes to cry out "Oh, my GAWD!" when I found a cartoon listed that I remembered (and, believe me, I remember PLENTY of 'em) and read how some paranoid, holier-than-thou, supremely egotistical, unbelievably presumptuous network censor has BUTCHERED it!
I am still in shock! I had NO IDEA that this was going on! I mean, sure, I KNOW about censorship but, I am aghast at the temerity of these people to even SUGGEST that they have the right to chop someone else's artwork up into unrecognizable pieces! (The unmitigated GALL!)
The following examples are taken directly from "A Guide To Censored Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies" listed on the goldenagecartoons.com website:
"Beep, Beep!" (Jones; 1952):
Nickelodeon: In the original version of this cartoon, Wile E. Coyote falls off of a cliff and before he hits gorge bottom, he swallows two Aspirin. Nickelodeon removed the Aspirin.
"Cats A-Weigh" (McKimson; 1953):
CBS: Sylvester corners a real mouse, who quickly eats some vitamins and begins throwing Sylvester against the ship's walls, creating what Junior terms "a good impression". Since CBS spliced away the vitamin-eating, the viewer had no idea what made the little mouse so strong.
"The Crackpot Quail" (Avery; 1941):
Syndication: When this cartoon was originally released, the quail would constantly make a razzing noise in order to keep his top knot from falling down over his eyes, but most re-issue copies seen today replace the razz with a whistle.
"Curtain Razor" (Freleng; 1949):
CN: The wolf drinking gasoline is gone.
I wasn't at all prepared, however, for the section of the website called "Censored Cartoons". In fact, I'm surprised that a huge bug didn't fly into my mouth as it was hanging open in disbelief for the better part of an hour as I skimmed through every, single cartoon listed in that section -- stopping every couple of minutes to cry out "Oh, my GAWD!" when I found a cartoon listed that I remembered (and, believe me, I remember PLENTY of 'em) and read how some paranoid, holier-than-thou, supremely egotistical, unbelievably presumptuous network censor has BUTCHERED it!
I am still in shock! I had NO IDEA that this was going on! I mean, sure, I KNOW about censorship but, I am aghast at the temerity of these people to even SUGGEST that they have the right to chop someone else's artwork up into unrecognizable pieces! (The unmitigated GALL!)
The following examples are taken directly from "A Guide To Censored Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies" listed on the goldenagecartoons.com website:
"Beep, Beep!" (Jones; 1952):
Nickelodeon: In the original version of this cartoon, Wile E. Coyote falls off of a cliff and before he hits gorge bottom, he swallows two Aspirin. Nickelodeon removed the Aspirin.
"Cats A-Weigh" (McKimson; 1953):
CBS: Sylvester corners a real mouse, who quickly eats some vitamins and begins throwing Sylvester against the ship's walls, creating what Junior terms "a good impression". Since CBS spliced away the vitamin-eating, the viewer had no idea what made the little mouse so strong.
"The Crackpot Quail" (Avery; 1941):
Syndication: When this cartoon was originally released, the quail would constantly make a razzing noise in order to keep his top knot from falling down over his eyes, but most re-issue copies seen today replace the razz with a whistle.
"Curtain Razor" (Freleng; 1949):
CN: The wolf drinking gasoline is gone.
Merrie Melodies: The scene in which the wolf drinks gasoline and swallows a match was gone, but not cut was his drinking of the atomic powder and TNT.
Nickelodeon: Missing was the bird version of Al Jolson talking about his "Mammy".
"A Day at the Zoo" (Avery; 1939):
CN: A visual gag of "smoking" camels is missing from this cartoon.
"Hare Splitter" (Freleng; 1948):
ABC: This was censored. When Casbah becomes wise to Bugs' trickery, he says, "You can't fool me no more. You're dat screwy rabbit," and readies to punch Bugs. Bugs dons a pair of glasses and says, "You wouldn't hit a guy with glasses on, would you?" Casbah responds by delivering a punch into Bugs' eyes, breaking the glasses, and Bugs utters, "You know, I believe he would."
"Hollywood Steps Out" (Avery; 1941):
WB: This cartoon was definitely missing two scenes: first, Greta Garbo offering to Cary Grant a cigarette and then lighting a match for him on her giant shoe; second, Harpo Marx giving to Garbo a hot-foot. Possible long-lost footage was missing between the scenes of Clark Gable sitting at a table and watching a woman walk past him and Bing Crosby introducing Leopold Stokowski, as well as after the scene which reveals Groucho Marx to be the woman whom Gable was following.
"The Rebel Without Claws" (Freleng; 1961):
CN: There is a fade to black before the Confederate officer can say, "Damn Yankees," and when Tweety says, "I tawt I taw a damn Yankee tat," the "damn" is missing.
Merrie Melodies: The scenes on the ship involving cannon blasts to Sylvester's face were omitted from the cartoon proper but included as a "Hip Clip" in another installment of Merrie Melodies.
WB: When the Confederate officer says, "Damn Yankees," the "damn" was deleted. Also, Tweety's line, "I tawt I taw a damn Yankee tat," was censored altogether.
Rookie Revue" (Freleng; 1941):
CN: In the series of mess hall gags, the scene featuring the "suicide squad" unhappily eating out of a large bowl labeled "Hash" is removed.
"Scent-imental Romeo" (Jones; 1951):
ABC: The female cat clubs Pepe in the head several times, causing Pepe to see multiple images of her. This act of violence was shortened considerably.
CN: The shot of Pepe Le Pew opening a bottle of champagne was cut.
"Southern Fried Rabbit" (Freleng; 1953):
CN: This scene is gone: To pass the Mason-Dixon Line guarded by Yosemite Sam, Bugs disguises himself as a black man playing a banjo and singing a somber song. Sam allows the supposed Negro ("One ofour boys") to pass into the South, until Bugs starts a rendition of "Yankee Doodle" and his "cover" is "blown". Bugs then acts like a poor slave ("Please don't beat me, massa! Don't beat this tired old body!") and places a whip in Sam's hands, before then appearing as Abraham Lincoln to scold Sam ("What's this I hear about you whippin' slaves?"). The first instance of Yosemite Sam yelling, "Charge!" has now been removed, probably because of the Confederate flag which is seen at that point in the cartoon when it is watched uncut.
Merrie Melodies: Same edit to the "slave scene" as on CN. Plus, Sam being blasted by a cannon was replaced by a still shot of Bugs as the Southern belle.
WB: Same edit as on CN.
I gotta tell ya, the thought terrifies the hell outta me that there might be factions of (presumably) parents out there who don't think their own offspring have enough sense to know the difference between what they see in some silly, little cartoon and how things are in REAL LIFE.
The reason WHY a (supposedly) functioning, adult (well, "adult" enough to have engaged in the act of procreation, apparently...) would believe their kid is going to run right out and and stick a piece of dynamite down somebody's throat (or light up a cigarette, take a bottle of pills or hit someone over the head with an umbrella 16 times) just because they saw a cartoon character doing it on TV completely BAFFLES me!
If I was a kid, I would be TERRIBLY insulted and HURT that my own parents thought of me as a total idiot devoid of any SHRED of common sense or moral character.
If their kids are really THAT confused, it shouldn't take a "rocket surgeon" to figure out that they need to find more time in their busy workaday schedules to sit down with their kids and make a SERIOUS EFFORT to explain the fundamental differences between "all that fantasy stuff" and "all this real stuff" (or they might consider just cuttin' back on the kid's Ridilin and Ding-Dong rations, fer cryin' out loud).
But I worry that there are far SCARIER things these kids (with parents who obviously don't have a CLUE how to go about raising responsible adults) could inflict upon an unsuspecting society than hittin' their little brother over the head a couple of times with an umbrella.
I mean, if their own moms and dads don't trust 'em, how in the hell are WE supposed to?
The "Ostrich Method" of discipline doesn't even work for OSTRICHES. "Outta sight, outta mind" only works for as long as it takes the kid to pick up that next magazine, hear that next TV commercial, read that next billboard or see that next MTV video.
I'd be willing to bet that these are the same parents who run around frantically stowing their Drano and bleach in secret hiding places rather than just sitting down with their kids, SHOWING them all that nasty stuff, EXPLAINING what it is and what it does and then just teaching them how to SMELL THINGS before they put 'em in their mouths.
Gee, that whole "secret hiding place thing" worked so WELL with the kids' Christmas presents (because NONE of us EVER found any of our OWN Christmas presents before Christmas that were hidden in our parents' closets, did we?), I can certainly see why they'd want to revive the process for the HOUSEHOLD POISONS.
The particular cartoon "cuts" that spread the scrumptious icing of INDIGNATION right across my OWN personal cake, however, were the ones requiring you to take about three giant LEAPS beyond what ANYBODY would consider a normal person's mental association of words and ideas and then STREEEEEETCH as far as you can reach on your tiptoes to reach the same conclusion that the censors did.
And, even then, I STILL come up empty handed for ANY valid reason WHY one musn't show a huge can of "hash" on the supper table in a mess hall full of GIs or (heaven FORBID) a quail blowing that little black feather they all have on their heads outta his face.
I guess there's a special place in HELL for those cartoonists depraved enough to graphically portray quail feathers blowing around. They're probably forced to spend all eternity bunking with those OTHER evil cartoonists who blatantly exhibit cartoon mice taking vitamins pills. (The PERVERTS!)
I'm not sure what anyone can do at this point to stem the already devastating loss some of these old cartoon artworks have suffered.
The author of the "Golden Age of Cartoons" website, "Jon", suggests that, in many cases, the original versions may no longer even exist. But, I'm all for organizing against this practice. As a matter of fact, I already have an idea for our "rallying cry": "Da wabbit kicked da bucket! Da wabbit kicked da bucket!"
The reason WHY a (supposedly) functioning, adult (well, "adult" enough to have engaged in the act of procreation, apparently...) would believe their kid is going to run right out and and stick a piece of dynamite down somebody's throat (or light up a cigarette, take a bottle of pills or hit someone over the head with an umbrella 16 times) just because they saw a cartoon character doing it on TV completely BAFFLES me!
If I was a kid, I would be TERRIBLY insulted and HURT that my own parents thought of me as a total idiot devoid of any SHRED of common sense or moral character.
If their kids are really THAT confused, it shouldn't take a "rocket surgeon" to figure out that they need to find more time in their busy workaday schedules to sit down with their kids and make a SERIOUS EFFORT to explain the fundamental differences between "all that fantasy stuff" and "all this real stuff" (or they might consider just cuttin' back on the kid's Ridilin and Ding-Dong rations, fer cryin' out loud).
But I worry that there are far SCARIER things these kids (with parents who obviously don't have a CLUE how to go about raising responsible adults) could inflict upon an unsuspecting society than hittin' their little brother over the head a couple of times with an umbrella.
I mean, if their own moms and dads don't trust 'em, how in the hell are WE supposed to?
The "Ostrich Method" of discipline doesn't even work for OSTRICHES. "Outta sight, outta mind" only works for as long as it takes the kid to pick up that next magazine, hear that next TV commercial, read that next billboard or see that next MTV video.
I'd be willing to bet that these are the same parents who run around frantically stowing their Drano and bleach in secret hiding places rather than just sitting down with their kids, SHOWING them all that nasty stuff, EXPLAINING what it is and what it does and then just teaching them how to SMELL THINGS before they put 'em in their mouths.
Gee, that whole "secret hiding place thing" worked so WELL with the kids' Christmas presents (because NONE of us EVER found any of our OWN Christmas presents before Christmas that were hidden in our parents' closets, did we?), I can certainly see why they'd want to revive the process for the HOUSEHOLD POISONS.
The particular cartoon "cuts" that spread the scrumptious icing of INDIGNATION right across my OWN personal cake, however, were the ones requiring you to take about three giant LEAPS beyond what ANYBODY would consider a normal person's mental association of words and ideas and then STREEEEEETCH as far as you can reach on your tiptoes to reach the same conclusion that the censors did.
And, even then, I STILL come up empty handed for ANY valid reason WHY one musn't show a huge can of "hash" on the supper table in a mess hall full of GIs or (heaven FORBID) a quail blowing that little black feather they all have on their heads outta his face.
I guess there's a special place in HELL for those cartoonists depraved enough to graphically portray quail feathers blowing around. They're probably forced to spend all eternity bunking with those OTHER evil cartoonists who blatantly exhibit cartoon mice taking vitamins pills. (The PERVERTS!)
I'm not sure what anyone can do at this point to stem the already devastating loss some of these old cartoon artworks have suffered.
The author of the "Golden Age of Cartoons" website, "Jon", suggests that, in many cases, the original versions may no longer even exist. But, I'm all for organizing against this practice. As a matter of fact, I already have an idea for our "rallying cry": "Da wabbit kicked da bucket! Da wabbit kicked da bucket!"
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